Have you ever had this feeling?
After a long and hectic day at work, it`s finally time to get ready for bed.
Deep inside, you have been dreading this moment, even though you have tried to shake it off.
You know that it will probably happen tonight…all over again.
After the toothbrush has been giving your teeth some spa treatment for about 10 seconds…you stop.
The person in the mirror is staring back at you. The facial expression tells you that the person looks rather clueless…
…and you are.
The face that was rather good-looking 10 seconds ago, has now turned into a zombie looking figure who has been infected by rabies.
With the mouth wide-open and white foam all over the place, the thing starts to speak…
“Wa e ek di I aktly o oay?”
That can be translated to “what the heck did actually do today?”
You realize that you have entered the ranks of the living dead, who walks mindless through the day.
This can often happen when you are overworked, juggling too many balls, stressed and are suffering from lack of sleep.
I will now give you the recipe on how to take control of your life again.
The art of start saying no
We have all been given 24 hours each day, this means that we are operating in the same timeframe whether you are a homeless person on the street or Donald Trump.
Where you are in your life today, is a direct result of how you have been spending your 24 hours each and every single day, to this point.
If you feel like your business is not thriving the way it should, you`ve probably not been putting in enough hours of the correct activities.
[Tweet “If you feel like your business is not thriving the way it should, you`ve probably not been putting in enough hours of the correct activities.”]
Notice, I didn`t say enough hours. I said, enough hours of the correct activities.
In Norway we have an expression that is called to “spoon feed”. That means that you are explaining something to a person by simplifying it, just to make sure that they understand.
Now is the proper time for me to say to you, I`m sorry.
I`m sorry for spoon-feeding you that last part. But it`s THAT important.
So how can successful people get more time?
They are very good at saying no.
Note: I`ve created a Say No Cheat Sheet that has helped me to take control of my time.
Click the button below to get it for free (normally I just give them to my coaching clients).
Here are the 3 reasons why saying no can make you more successful…
1. Feed your own family first
You should spend your time on the areas in your life that is most important for you. This may of course vary from person to person.
My priorities in life are in the following order:
A. Sara (my better half) and the baby who will arrive in the start of June
Here I put my own family first. I would do anything for Sara and the unborn baby.
Next, myself. I do care that I`m healthy, happy and are having a good life.
Then it`s my business. Why is this so important for me, and why is it ranked even higher than family and friends?
Well, that is really a very simple answer. Because of point A and B.
Since I quit my six figure corporate job in order to start my own business, it`s crucial that I get it up and running.
Only by succeeding in running my business, will I be able to provide for Sara, the baby and myself.
Then it`s of course my family and then my friends.
2. By saying yes, you are saying no to something else
Many people are, how shall I put it?
I`ll just say it. They are too kind.
They say yes to almost everything, because they are afraid to hurt other people`s feelings, and they are afraid what people might think of them, if they say no.
To that I say: STOP IT!
If you have done this so far in life, that`s okay. But today is the time when you will change and start saying NO.
Because you probably have been prioritizing other people before yourself most of your life. You deserve better.
When you say yes to something, you are actually saying no to something else.
So, let`s say your neighbor asked you to drive him and his son to a football match, because their car is being repaired. Note, you were not invited to the football match, you were only asked to be the driver.
If you say yes to this, you will probably spend the whole evening driving them to the match, and picking them up.
If a good old friend is suddenly in town and asks you to catch up. You will have to say no to that, unless he thinks it`s really fun to join you and observe how you spend your free time doing charity work for your neighborhood. Don`t take it personal if your friend says no.
3. If you give them a finger, they will take the whole hand
Many people are selfish and they are often taking advantage of very good-hearted people (read: you).
If you start saying yes to helping people with chores or tasks that is not natural of you to do, you will most likely start to get requests from other people as well.
Because you have now gotten a reputation! You have become the go to guy or gal, who almost always says yes to weird and awkward requests, that no one else will help them out with (not even their own family). Congratulations!
There is an expression saying “if you give them a finger, they will take the whole hand.”
The irony here, is that you said yes, because you don`t like to say no.
What happened? More requests have been coming your way.
What you focus on expands.
If you don`t start saying no, more requests will come. And trust me. It won`t become easier to say no further down the road.
Get out of your comfort zone, and grow some balls (sorry for my French, you know what I mean.)
Nothing worth accomplishing has ever been made without pushing yourself out of the comfort zone.
[Tweet “Nothing worth accomplishing has ever been made without pushing yourself out of the comfort zone.”]
Now is the time to finally take your life back, and stop being a living dead.
Disclaimer: I just need to say that I don`t mean that you should say NO to everything. I mean that you should become a lot more conscious of what you are actually saying yes to.
You could be saying yes to requests as long as they don`t interfere with your prioritized list.
What do I mean?
If you want to go for a run, and your better half, needs you to go to the store and buy some more diapers, because you are out. You go and buy the diapers, and then you go for a run.
Because you prioritize A before B.
Then it`s B before C, and C before D. You get the point.
Successful people share and are generous, but seldom with their time.
Because they only have 24 hours too. They are more likely to give a big donation to a charity fund, than giving a random person a free 1 on 1 meeting.
Because they have lots of money, but still only 24 hours a day.
Where do you find it difficult to say no?
Please drop a comment below.
Here`s what to do next…
I`ve got something special for you. It`s a “Cheat Sheet” that will help you to prioritize your most valuable asset – your time.
This is normally something I only give to my coaching clients, but I wanted to give you some extra value today.
Click on the picture below to download your FREE Say No Cheat Sheet and start taking control of YOUR LIFE!
About Tor Refsland
I help online entrepreneurs NETWORK with influencers and position their BRAND so they can attract the right CLIENTS fast. Award-winning blogger.